10. Kirk Van Houten – sad dad energy

9. Krusty the Clown, but only after having faked his death

8. Superintendent Chalmers – power, rage, something about his voice

7. Dr. Hibbert – happy dad energy, plus he’s a doctor

6. Kent Brockman – this one’s like 90% eyebrows

5. Troy McClure – seems the most heteroflexible man in town

4. (Stupid Sexy) Flanders – caring, giving, built, moustache

3. Duffman – he’s the meathead+lunkhead+drunk trifecta

2. Snake Jailbird – that hair and the man has been in jail

1. Groundskeeper Willie – no surprise here

If you decide to do a similar list and want to find pics of these or other Simpsons characters, I strongly suggest you turn SafeSearch off.